Titus 1:14 - Pay no attention to Jewish myths
Use the scientific method. what test can be done to prove an invisible god?
1 Thes 5:21 - Test everything. Hold on to the good.
Good advise from god if you have a penis
Numbers 31:17-18 - Now kill all the boys. And kill every woman who has slept with a man, but save for yourselves every girl who has never slept with a man.
Cut off wife's hand if she tried to protect her husband
Deut. 5:11-12 - If two men fight together, and the wife of one draws near to rescue her husband from the hand of the one attacking him, and puts out her hand and seizes him by the genitals, then you shall cut off her hand; your eye shall not pity her.
Forced to marry your rapist
Deuteronomy 22:28-29 - If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, he shall pay the girl's father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the girl, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives.
You are more unclean if you give birth to a daughter
Leviticus 12:1-5 - The LORD said to Moses, “Say to the Israelites: ‘A woman who becomes pregnant and gives birth to a son will be ceremonially unclean for seven days, just as she is unclean during her monthly period. On the eighth day the boy is to be circumcised. Then the woman must wait thirty-three days to be purified from her bleeding. She must not touch anything sacred or go to the sanctuary until the days of her purification are over. If she gives birth to a daughter, for two weeks the woman will be unclean, as during her period. Then she must wait sixty-six days to be purified from her bleeding.
A woman is defiled if she remarries
Deuteronomy 24:1-4 - If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he dies, then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she has been defiled. That would be detestable in the eyes of the LORD. Do not bring sin upon the land the LORD your God is giving you as an inheritance.
Women are worse than men
Ecclesiastes 7:27-29 - Look, says the Teacher, this is what I have discovered: Adding one thing to another to discover the scheme of things— while I was still searching but not finding— I found one upright man among a thousand, but not one upright woman among them all. This only have I found: God made mankind upright, but men have gone in search of many schemes.
Don't touch a woman if she is on her period
Lev 24:19 - When a woman has her regular flow of blood, the impurity of her monthly period will last seven days, and anyone who touches her will be unclean till evening.
Rules around selling your daughter
Exodus 21:7 - If a man sells his daughter as a servant, she is not to go free as menservants do
God controls each rolling of the dice
Proverbs 16:33 - The lot is cast into the lap, but its every decision is from the LORD.
The value of beating the crap out of people
Proverbs 20:30 - Blows and wounds cleanse away evil, and beatings purge the inmost being
Things you can be put to death for (stoning unless noted otherwise)
if you are a medium (Lev 20:27)
if you blaspheme Jehovah's name (Lev 24:16)
if you worship a different god (Deu 13:6-10)
if you rebel against your parents (Deu 21:18-21)
if you are a drunk (Deu 21:18-21)
if you are a woman who is not a virgin when she marries (Deu 22:20,21)
if you are gay (Lev 20:13)
if you work on the Sabbath (Num 15:32-26;Exodus 35:2)
if you are a witch (Lev 20:27)
if your father is a priest and you become a prostitute (burned to death) (Lev 21:9)
if you are a woman and you didn't scream loud enough when you raped (Deu 22:23-24)
Bible Biology creating spotted offspring. Its in the water.
Genesis 30:37-39 - Jacob, however, took fresh-cut branches from poplar, almond and plane trees and made white stripes on them by peeling the bark and exposing the white inner wood of the branches. Then he placed the peeled branches in all the watering troughs, so that they would be directly in front of the flocks when they came to drink. When the flocks were in heat and came to drink, they mated in front of the branches. And they bore young that were streaked or speckled or spotted.
Too Much Information
Judges 3:21-22 - And Ehud reached with his left hand, took the sword from his right thigh, and thrust it into his belly. And the hilt also went in after the blade, and the fat closed over the blade, for he did not pull the sword out of his belly; and the dung came out.
2 Kings 18:27 - But Rabshakeh said unto them, Hath my master sent me to thy master, and to thee, to speak these words? Hath he not sent me to the men which sit on the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own piss with you?
God, the Abortion Doctor
Hosea 13:16 - Samaria shall bear her guilt, because she has rebelled against her God; they shall fall by the sword; their little ones shall be dashed in pieces, and their pregnant women ripped open.
Psalm 137:9 - Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
The cost of rape only 50 shekels
If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, he shall pay the girl’s father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the girl, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives.